Baby Daddy…SO NOT A CLICHÉ
You meet a guy at probably the most successful point in your life, you are in great shape physically and mentally and he seems to be a wonderfully refreshing change from the men you have known thus far. That is, of course, until you get to know him.
At first it doesn’t seem to be an issue that he has a local tavern he visits each and every day after work, I mean, he has no children and no one to go home to. The bar is his family. It becomes even more understandable when you come to find he is from an abused home and orphaned, living most of his life in foster homes. Then you want to take care of him. You want to give him the security no one else ever has, and why not? He is sweet and doting, and hangs on your every word in admiration. WHAT HAVE I DONE? That’s all you can think when you realize he is looking for a mommy he never had.
I suppose it would be easy to deal with, decide to be his mommy, or be the mature, educated woman that you are and walk. A little piece of relationship advice if you ever find yourself in this situation…WALK!!!
There is no way to “fix” this broken little boy, and if you would have allowed yourself to see past the party buddy you now have who ends every night with phenomenal sex and listened to reason, and your friends, you would have found this out before you became disillusioned by the idea that getting knocked up would make him grow up!
Now don’t get me wrong, the baby boy that has been born of this tragic and preventable union, is now the light of my life. Every waking moment I want to kiss every inch of his face, something I know from experience will change and turn into constant frustration largely because of the ungodly resemblance to that other boy I can now only refer to as “My Baby Daddy.”
There is never a moment that goes by that I did not believe that could be a title he would carry without issue. I always prepared myself for being a single parent; again, after having 2 teenagers whose father thought it was a better idea to commit suicide than being a part-time dad. I knew I could raise these children “I” decided to birth, and if need be, alone. If you don’t want to be a father than there is no one who can make you, but since you will always be “My Baby Daddy”, there will never be a neatly paved road for you to walk. No threats, heh heh, I’m just sayin.
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Tags: dating mistakes, relationship mistakes, single moms, single parent
December 10th, 2008 at 5:40 pm
I enjoyed this post. I think when a guy want you to be his “mommy”, as you put it, he is physiologically dominated with feminine energy. This is not to say he is more of a female, but energy can be feminine or masculine.
I’m guessing you were more of the decision maker of the two, he couldn’t make up is mind, and spent too much time thinking that whatever you wanted to do would be best, when really you just craved the need for a man, full of masucline energy, to make a decision and stand by it.
I look forward to reading more from you!